Today ended up being one of those perfect days that you weren't expecting. In the course of trying to stay awake enough to be a mother, I stumbled upon the most beautiful energy I had forgotten was out there. Spending time on the swing with my oldest friend and our children was the realest and happiest I've felt in a long time. Had the world ended right then, where we were was alright with us. There's something to be said about how uncertain the last day we spend on earth will be. Taking the time to make sure that every moment you spend here makes you feel that happy is the only way you can wrap your head around having to leave all this behind at some point. This place is pretty amazing.
Which made me start thinking about going to the Springs yesterday and the incredibly ungrateful gaggle of heathens that left all of their trash strewn about the shore and floating in the water I was trying to relax in. Who would be so inconsiderate to sully my place of peace? Those people, that's who. It's rude and I will not stand for it. And even as I walked around picking up their garbage (which definitely included a dirty diaper), I held this notion that these people had no idea how sacred that place is to me and it made me feel very sad for their children. What we leave behind says a lot about who we are and those kids have hardly a fair shot at ending up being decent people with role models like that. Take care of the world and people around you and everything that sucks about this world would be pretty close to not existing anymore.
In spite of all of this, I still carry this feeling that maybe one day, my hope in mankind will be restored....a girl can dream.
So, as I lay here on the pallet I've made for me and the boy, he is watching Shrek and I am listening to Mr. Neil Young on my headphones all while carrying this feeling that tomorrow may or may not be here when I wake up, but my smile most certainly will be.
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